Most parents think that spanking is the right method to instill discipline in their children. However, this is not the case, as spanking do not teach the children the values that are necessary for them to become competent adults. It has negative effects to the childrens life which are carried forward to their adult life. It makes the children develop fear for the parent, and never becomes free to share anything with them at any time in their life. Aggression and violence are also increased in the children because of the hostile treatment they receive from the parents. Spanking also makes other methods of instilling discipline into the children less effective, and as much as a parent can try, they never work in the children. Therefore, spanking as a method of disciplining children for negative behaviors should not be encouraged.
Children develop fear for the parent if spanking is what they receive always after wrong-doing. According to American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP),a learning environment should be characterized by positive, supportive parent-child relationship (Mc Coy 23). Spanking replaces this relationship between the child and the parent, letting fear to take lead instead. The children grow to fear their parents. This fear leads the children to do everything the parent suggests since they are afraid to receive the hostile treatment which is a routine every time they do wrong. This is called false-discipline. In other times fear might lead to the childrens failure to respect the parent because of how hurt they could be feeling. The children can grow up with fear of every adult, or even fear of handling the challenges they face in life. It is, therefore, advisable that a parent stops corporal punishment and seek for ways to create a friendly relationship with the child. This can help the parent to reason with the child and instill discipline in a better way (Walters 56).
Spanking also makes the children to become aggressive and violent as theygrow up (Walters 65; Mc Coy 50). The children get the impression that violence is the best way to solve any conflict,especially when dealing with someone younger than them. They might think that the junior personhas no right to express their opinion to the seniors, as they have often been treated by their parents. The children can extend the aggressiveness to school and always cause conflicts with their classmates. This behavior might become the childrens character, making it hard to change as they grow up (Judy, 2007). The children can end up becoming troublesome in the society.They always become angry with those who wrong them or do what they do not like. To avoid bringing up such aggressive children, parents should be very cautious in dealing with their children. They can lead their childrens life in the wrong direction while intending to better it. It has been observed that the aggressive behavior in children can cause them to have mood disorders, anxiety, engaging in drug abuse and other activities that leave a lot to be desired in the childs life.
Spanking acts as a block to other methods of instilling discipline in children (Walters 45) such as sympathetic guidance, withdrawal of their favorite toys or games, restriction from visiting or partying with friends in case of adolescents, among others. This is because the relationship between the children and the parents is not well established. The parent fails to create a friendly relationship with the children. It, therefore, becomes hard for the children to trust the parent. This hinders the parent from giving other forms of discipline to the children, since they can not trust the parent to offer any other kind except spanking (Gershof, 2002). The childrencan not wait to be given any form of guidance by the parent, since they are always fearful that they might receive a beating (Mc Coy 68). In case the parent needs to share anything with the children as a lesson, they might not be able to pass their ideas across sufficiently.
In relation to the reasons given above, spanking should be discouraged by all means. It develops fear in the children making them to become timid in their life. This hinders them from handling the challenges they face in life, because they were not taught how to be competent enough. The positive parent-child relationship also fails to develop and the children can not confide in the parent. Instead, the children seek alternative methods of defending themselves. In so doing, they become aggressive and violent, extending this in their adult life; in the work place, to friends and also to their spouses. It is also hard for the parent to utilize other forms of disciplining the children if they choose spanking as the major method (Walters 54). Instead of spanking, there are other methods that are more efficient, which, if embraced, can produce a better, competent adult in the children (Mc Coy 78). Such methods could include things like positive incentives to encourage a better behavior, sympathetic guidance or even withdrawal of what they like most. These will help the children grow into competent, disciplined young adults. Therefore, these reasons support that children should not be spanked in order to discipline them for a negative behavior.
Mc Coy, Krisha.Should you spank your child?4th Jan 2013. Web. 28th July 2014.
Walters, Rob. Spanking, ages 3 to 6. 11th Mar 2014. Web. 28th July 2014.
Judy, Arnall.Disciplinewithout distress: 135 tools for raising caring, responsible children without time out, spanking, punishment or bribery.Alberta: Professional Parenting, 2007. Print.
Gershof, Elizabeth Thompson. Corporal punishment by parenting and association behaviors and experiences: A meta -analytic and theoretical review. Psychological Bulletin. Alberta: American Psychological Association, 2002. Print.